My Garden ON THE PATIO

Ok So my next door neighbor has the most beautiful plants out side and I wanted a little color on my side, so I bought a few small plants and this is whay I've got so far... Also I'm repainting my patio furniture , it's plastic and I found this rustolem paint that works specifically on plastics. It looks beautiful... Oh yes and the BIKE hey NOw!!

here are some of the flowers I planted.... My Nieghbor back porch thats connected to mine. This view is from my side.

Bellie the neighborhood cat. He likes to visit all the differentpeople around the hood and stock up on snacks.

My table I ran out of paint but I just bought another can to finish it...

Bellly snoozing...

Plants

THE rug... lol

This is the rug... you who know will know what I'm talking about... Simpily amazing ...

Really Cool TREE

I saw this tree yesterday and want one of these in my yard!! Does anyone know what kind of plant this is?? Well I'm working now so I better get back to it!!

my awesome new boots

I've ALWAYS wanted these boots.....

Hellloooo

Now this is one BOLd bird... This is ONE of the reasons bird freak me out!!!

where is everybody???

Where are all u guys... Let me guess... FACEBOOK!!! LOl I don't like it now, I liked it before ...:/

I don't have a lot of time, so here is a photo of something I like...THIS is where i want to live... on this street with those Hydrangis bushes growing EVERYWHERE!!!!

Tiptoeing through the tulips... and they cost so much at the grocery store!!!LOL

Jacket for Summer??

So I found this jacket and I really like it. I thought it might be good for SummZ or Brig?? Do either of you like it? It is a size Large from Charlotte Russe. Let me know because I will list it if you don't like it. Yay for BDUB!! The fabric is suede and the red design is embroidered on , the fur is faux. VERY Winter Pocahontas

wanna laugh??

Today just want to share some things that make me smile ..

When Pigs swim...

I'm in a better mood. So I want to share this picture... I Love pigs..
This rabbit reminds me of the princess the ears anyway... lol I really like the pigs..... LOL

Another Day.

So another day has gone by and I feel like SHIT. Yes I spelled it with no *^$%# or anything!! Ha

I am sad, miserable and somehow moving through the days. I tried a new med today and I don't like it... or maybe it's just the BS in my life right now. AGGHh i'm in a reaLLY Crummy mood. I hate this crap. Now I'm going to post a photo that REFLECTS my mood...

Now I'm just pissed

See how the cycle goes...denial, sadness, now I'm starting to come out of the fog and see what's really up. NOW I'm pissed and I feel like someone has trespassed on my property, being myself and my life. He is really trying to ruin things for where I live hoping they won't let me stay.... Whatever. I will stay and will be happy. So F%$K off Loser. Here is what's in my mind..."Maybe, Just maybe, you could do Something if you had enough initiative to get a JOB and work... but since you don't, all you can do is follow my shadow and try to trip me up. Good luck with that. That's gonna get you far in this life. If you were half as aggressive with your own life as you are with me, you might actually BE successful instead of blaming everyone else for the fact that your not. If you didn't spend all your time Reliving EVERY single thing anyone in the world has ever done wrong to you maybe you could move forward. If you could stop being so paranoid and stop procrastinating you might not be such a sorry miserable boy. I did the most I could for you and treated you like a king. To bad you blew it and fucked it up like you have everything else in your life. Some people will never learn."
That's just what is going through my mind now. I realized this person is ONLY trying to hurt me now... NOT just physically, not just emotionally but now with every aspect of my life.
The only thing he doesn't know is ... I've known someone like him before. They end up digging themselves a hole so deep, I can just sit back and watch.
Now I'm going back to work... Here is the photo for the day!! Kind of morbid but gets the point across dosen't it?

Friday

Well, last night was an orientation... Info but left feeling yuck and then when I turned on my phone, I had missed some calls that i think were him. I don't know why he would wait till now to call but whatever. I was reading a book about this issue this morning and discovered that it's not usually about any reason. It's about control and power over someone. No amount of reasoning or explaining will change the fact that this person is doing this and for the satisfaction of feeling in control and powerful. AKA a bully, in my opinion. The book said no amount of explaining or acting a different way or changing ANYTHING about yourself will make this person happy. So I guess what I'm left asking is... Have I been believing the illusion of "do to others as you would have done to you?" Does it "Take one to know one?"... I have always felt that if you are good enough to a person they will treat you nice and love you back. Some people have definitely proven me wrong (BILLY). But others have loved me back. It seems that some only love you when you are gone and they realize what it felt like to be loved and cared about.

I definitely need to have a different perspective on this situation because I am taking all the responsibility on myself for Everything. When I sit and allow myself to think back about situations I remember a lot of things that bothered me along the way. I think my biggest problem is being to forgiving and not making other people be responsible for their own actions.

Sometimes he would say that he shouldn't be with a person like me... what I think that means is a person with an opinion.

I am having a lot of quite time to remember a lot of things and times where I felt hurt. Like when he told me that he was embarrassed to be around me with his friends because I looked and acted like a bimbo. That people would think I was easy because of my personality and friendliness. That I spoke like "diarrhoea from the mouth" meaning I talked to much and somehow belittled him by the conversations I may be having regardless of the topic of the conversation. He Always corrected me about everything from how to speak to how to clean the toilet. there are so many things that I am realizing now and I write them down so I can remember when I get that lump in my throat and feel like my heart is breaking. I always like to add a pic with my blog so here it goes for today.....

Getting Help

So today I'm supposed to go to this WI Distress place for an orentation. I'm looking forward to it because I am hurting over this situation and I feel so sad and bad and like a big ball of crap. I hope this will help me sort it out. It is hard to talk to people who are close to you about the situation because they usually tell you your stupid or crazy to feel a certain way, but that dosen't really help. It really only makes you feel like NOONE likes you. I know I'm supposed to feel a certain way and be more concerned about my own self and my health and feelings but That is NOT how I feel. I love this person and want to FIX this. But I know I cannot. I feel like I'm a failure. No one wants to hear this so I'm gonna save it for the place. Love you all who take the time to read this but most of all B and SUMz. Hope things will lighten up in the coming days. PEACE!!=)

Home pics

Here you can see the Good Year Blimp as it goes over the house on it 's way to circle the beach.

I have this ridiculous look on my face ...
very Grammaish... LOL We have alot of cats that cruise around the neighborhood... This one has an excellent haircut! He looks like he has really thick neck and legs like Muscular!! Hilarious...

Posing for a nice shot.

And last but not least the sunset... looks like paradise!!

more pics of the Home Piece...

This is the tangerine tree that is at the bottom of the steps in the back yard.
Victor making up the bed..The pink 1950's bathroom!!=)

I'm going to make it very retro with either dark brown(chocolate), or a charcoal gray...

And last but not least here I am..... =)

Yayayayaya New Home

I haven't taken a bunch of pics yet but one or two I will add more as I take them... It is goping to be great!! Take a look!! This is the views from the front patio. We are on the 2 nd floor and can see the intracoastal from the patio. Some of the boats that pass by are taller than the 2 story bldg. in front of us!! =)

Our apartment is on the end so we have a good view.It will look much better when I have the plants andf the table out here.

This is looking the other way from our front door.

This is me coming down the staires going to work... They are repainting the building and the railings soon. I love it here, it is so cute and the next set of pics will be better!! Yay for new Home!!